Monday, 3 November 2008

The view from last week

I decided to go to my mothers on Monday with both Leyla and Kitty in tow, this was the lesser of two evils, the other would be to stay at home with Emin, with the prospect of no heating. Whereas at mothers she has both heating and a real log fire, oh, and real home cooking, a no brainer really.

Daisy had filled the week with a range of activities, non of which involved me or school work.

We breezed into Oxford on the bus and sat down to chicken pie. On Tuesday Kitty wanted to go to Primark, over an hour later we were exhausted and poor mother needed a coffee, she insisted we go to Thornton's rather than Pret a Manger which is my own personal comfort zone. The Oxford branch of Pret now inhabits one of the most beautiful medieval buildings in Oxford, I would far rather drink a mediocre coffee in a lovely building than a good coffee in a horrible, cramped, nasty, Formica ridden chocolate shop which is Thornton's. Mother INSISTED we would go to Thornton's and boy did she live to regret that decision.

Kitty being the OCD angel that she is has a bit of a 'thing' about how she likes her hot chocolate. She only likes it made with powder, she hates it made with syrup. Trust me you can not fool her she knows!

In the shop it is packed, with bundled up OAP's, children and lots of shopping bags, I am ordered to grab the only free table which is at best cramped. Kitty stomps over to me...

Kitty "she won't tell me if it is made with liquid or powder"

Me "well ask the lady behind the counter"
Kitty disappears and then returns having obviously confused and irritated my mother.

Kitty "great, now she says I can't have one"

Leyla runs over to me sits down and starts crying, I hear mother clearly ordering the hot chocolate's so tell them both to be patient.

Kitty "you don't understand, every time I ask what the hot chocolate is made of they both say "chocolate" they will not tell me if it is powder or not"

My mother arrives with a tray, on it is a latte and a cappuccino plus two hot chocolates, one is small and unadorned one is huge with cream on top.

All hell breaks loose, it transpires that Kitty wanted a large one without cream and Leyla wanted a small one with cream plus marshmallows.

Kitty sits and glowers at her tiny drink whilst Leyla beams with delight clutching her victorious mug of excess.

Mother then proceeds to explain that since we are in a chocolate shop they make hot chocolate with real chocolate, it appears that the girl behind the counter had mixed up the order and of course Kitty drew the short straw and is now fuming.

Mother "Kitty go and ask for a large one"

Kitty "no, it doesn't matter"

Leyla asks some innocuous question

Kitty (with venom) "It says on the board or can't you read?"

Leyla (smelling victory) Yes, but can you spell Dyslexia"?

Kitty is now apoplectic with anger, so I try very hard to calm her down and have a little joke, she looks at me and smiles

Kitty "mum, you have frothy cream on your nose"

It is now I make a fatal error, I pretend to wipe my nose on Kitty's jacket, I said pretend.. In the very next moment Kitty swipes her arm and knocks over the untouched hot chocolate all over the teeny tiny table. Mother kops the lot, it goes over her new trousers and into her handbag. Kitty gets up

Kitty " I suppose you are angry with me now"?

I am busy wiping and mopping up, mother cleans herself up, the shop assistant helps and calmly remarks that they only painted the walls last week, at this moment we realise that the chocolate had stealthily been dripping down the back wall into Leyla's bag of new clothes, she sobs again. Mother apologises, I tell mother off for apologising and we go back home and clean up.


materfamilias said...

What a lovely three-generation-of-women outing! Seriously, LOL!

miss milki said...

LOL "I suppose you are angry with me now?" Hilarious!

That would be a great story in a funny novel! Its funny because I think we've all been there - well maybe not literally with hot chocolate dripping down the walls - but I can easily imagine it happening! I would probably be the Kitty character - the kid that gets wound up to the point of disaster. My Mum always says I over-react! Of course then I calm down and few minutes later feel really embarrassed.

indigo16 said...

Yes, I did not shout because I knew deep down she was mortified, she apologised a hour later to me! I explaines it was her poor Gran who needed the apology.

La Belette Rouge said...

OMG this was hilarious and yet, at the time, there were moments when the comedy did not feel apparent. Your mother sounds like she was a pretty good sport. My mother would tell that story to everyone she knew and I would never hear the end it it.

And, Kitty, I am also terribly particular about my Cocoa. You are not alone.;-)

auntiegwen said...

I have days and daughters like these !