Thursday, 27 January 2011

Watching the weeks go by

Thursday always bites me in the arse, I seem to breeze through the week and suddenly about a gazillion posts bite the dust because I have not had time to write them. For instance I was going to discuss in great detail how difficult it is to accept the defrosting of emotional Coventry, I really want to tell him to fuck off when he starts to melt, but deep down there must remain some skerrick of love and so I after an all too brief protest I accepted the continuation of a rather lopsided relationship. He should be careful though, because when Leyla starts secondary school I will find it considerably easier to leave.
I should be truthful and state for the record that if he is a shed load of disappointment to me, I too am to him. I think he though he was getting a partner who would long to while aways hours just basking in the warmth of his companionship. Ha, nothing, and I mean nothing could be further from the truth. I am emotionally cold and fearsomely independent, frequently secretive, not to deceive but to keep some kind of privacy. He hates this, he marvels at my ability to stay in town for a whole 4 hours on a Saturday convinced I must be seeing someone!!!!! Four hours, seriously that is nothing, I pointed out he managed to entertain himself for seven days in Berlin, can he not see that is bloody amazing, not four hours in London.
He too has got to Thursday only to realise he is just watching from the sidelines, so intent is he on planning for his early retirement even he has accepted that he is failing to live any kind of life in the present, so to that end he has decided we should go out for a bite to eat on Saturday. It will end in tears I tell you, but not before I have shopped for my knee hi's in Tabio and browsed Uniqlo before meandering down to the British Museum. That is living!

Please find enclosed some mediocre images of the nicer stands at the London Art fair, my Pentax had a minor melt down at the dimly lit stands, memo to self, swallow pride and take the Lumix, it laughs in the face of crap lighting.

Oh to have a room like this!


La Belette Rouge said...

Defrosting is often messy but it also often leads to softening and awareness. I hope that the awareness brings you comfort and insight.
P.s. I am so with you on needing time alone. If He-weasel didn't understand my need for time alone I would NEVER make it.

materfamilias said...

You're so admirably (and messily) honest. Even with my guy, who you know is pretty great, I'm missing my alone time and trying not to be petty and exacting about the domestic stuff (ridiculous, really, given that he cooks and cleans and shops -- what could I be complaining about? but I do . . ). I do hope the next generation's women find the whole relationship thing easier -- this juggling of so many people's needs along with our own careers and passions is awfully tough. Hope there is some fun on Saturday. . .