Friday, 14 September 2007


The wave of depression that is threatening to engulf me has as usual come out of nowhere, I suspect the shock of returning to work has not helped, I miss my girls, I have not had time to paint, for reasons too boring to list work is total chaos. I have lost interest in my clothes because I am so HOT all the time ( yes I know its the bloody menopause but labelling it does not help) and I have so many lovely cardies to wear..I have to deal with yet another Au Pair, and Emin works all weekend leaving me with Leyla and no car. I am tired all the time despite 8 hours sleep, interest payments will rise again so that's another £75, my Liz Earle stuff never arrived. All little things but somehow all seem insurmountable and all I want to do is curl up with a book and sleep.
Talking of books Simon Hoggarts parliamentary sketches has made me laugh out loud so often in a way I thought only Bill Bryson could, I wish I could stay awake to read more.
On a positive note yesterday, when I came home I peeped through the living room window to see Kitty curled up on the sofa reading the latest Vogue earmarking her favourite pages. The apple has not fallen far from the tree there then. She is lucky, my mother read Good Housekeeping!
I have made 2 mental promises
1. Next Easter whilst Daisy is throwing herself down yet another European slope and whilst Emin& Leyla reside in Cyprus, I will take Kitty to Paris for a few days and have fun being a mum and a tourist again.
2. I have calculated that we will be Au Pair free in 5 years time, then that spare room will be mine or I will leave, I think I will have earned a room of my own by the age of 50.

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